celebraTINg exisTENce: June 2020

Snippets of those days I spent walking around the Old City Wall of Chiang Mai, Thailand.

"...Chiang Mai represents the prime diamond on the crown of Thailand, the crown cannot be sparkle and beauteous without the diamond..."

— King Rama V, 12 August 1883

Walking in one of my dream places. 💖💖💖 This trip was indeed nothing but pure solitude (state of being alone without being lonely).

I fell in love with the way I was quiet and how was I all alone because during that time my intuition voice became louder and I was able to call myself home.

I contemplated whether or not I'd hire a guide to tour me around the Old City Wall so I can maximize the time and have someone explain to me the places of interest. I decided not to though because my anti-social side didn't want to have someone to talk with so I just walked around on my own.

These photos below are from the afternoons and nights that I spent there. Kasi arte arte ko pa. Wala tuloy akong alam na history. HAHAHA! Nag search lang ako para naman may silbi 'to.

There are over 300 temples in Chiang Mai alone.

Tourists would usually choose the temples that pique their curiosity. I, however, chose temples that were near my hostel. Well, just for this walk though 'cause I joined group tours some of which I have blogged about before already.

Thailand Posts Link: here.

Wat Chedi Luang

Used to be Chiang Mai's tallest structure during the Kingdom of Lanna. It was likely damaged by an earthquake and a cannon fire by the Burmese when they were retaking the city.

This is actually my favorite temple in Chiang Mai Old City not only because of its history but because this place has programs called "Monk Chats Club" and "Meditation Retreat" for if you want to continue after the Monk Chat.

I was told that the purpose is allow monks to improve their English-speaking skills while conversing with foreigners and in return, the foreigners/visitors are able to learn more about Thai Culture, Monk's Life and/or life philosophies related to Buddhism. Having a monk to talk about these things was kind of healing and eye-opening. Kinikilig-kilig pa nga ko nun kasi kailan pa ba ko makikipag-usap sa monk ulit? Feeling at literal na once in a lifetime experience... though syempre, umaasa rin na sana hindi.

My greatest takeaway from that conversation is learning about Anicca/Anitya/Impermanence - nothing lasts, everything is in constant state of change. It's still a struggle for me (tao lang po! HAHA) but having a conversation with a monk to look back on gives me peace and adds more appreciation to life.

Why? 'Cause sad and happy moments in life both don't last. Nakakatakot man isipin na hindi tatagal 'yung saya na nararamdaman mo pero kung dumating 'yung pagkakataon na yakapin ka ng lungkot... diba, nakakatuwa isipin na hindi rin 'yon magtatagal?

I'm definitely in a higher vibration now compared to how I felt a few months ago when my world came crashing down. HAHAHA! Low vibes talaga ako nung March, besh. Buong pagkatao at naging mga desisyon ko, kinu-kwestiyon ko isa-isa. Ikaw na sabay mawalan ng trabaho at true love (lakwatsa). HAHAHAHAHAHA! Muntanga. Ngayon, OA na ko pakinggan pero parang kailan lang, feeling lost talaga ako. HAHAHAHA! Laking tulong ng mga friends kong nakausap din tungkol dito. Feeling namin, sabay kami nag level-up sa buhay. HAHAHA! Well, technically lost pa rin naman ako ngayon pero natanggap ko na. Acceptance is the first step, diba? HAHAHAHAHA!

Walang naging mali sa'kin. Inayos ko dati - I did the things and decisions that I thought were best for me.

Hindi ko kasalanan na nawala lahat ng hawak ko. Hindi ko kasalanan na may COVID.

Pinakamahalaga ngayon? Nagsisimula at aayusin ulit.

HAHAHAHA! Dami ko namang HAHAHA!

"... If I were to go back and relive it differently, I wouldn't be me. And I like me."

May I's 2020 - My acceptance and moving on.

Wat Inthakin - Black Temple at the side of the road

This caught my attention so I had to go nearer to check if this was indeed a temple or not. Definitely unique 'cause unlike other temples which have outer walls, this is just there at the side of the road.

This was the second day that I walked around in Chiang Mai.

There was a night market so I decided to look around for souvenirs and dinner. This was the only time I went out of the Old City Wall towards a place I don't even know. HAHAHA! Sinundan ko lang talaga 'yung mga tao at mga tindahan tapos kung saan-saan na ko napadpad.

I don't know what was happening but I went in 'cause there was a program. Naki-chismis lang pero wala rin naman akong napala kasi hindi ko naintindihan kung ano nangyayari.

The (night) market experiences are one of the things I miss. I am not the type of traveler who would go to crowded places but I love night markets so I put up with the crowd. Ngayon, ang sarap sabihin na gagawin ko po lahat makapaglakad lang ulit sa crowd ng hindi kakabahan kung may COVID. HAHAHA! Haaaaaay, the things we took for granted talaga.

MY FAVORITE NIGHT MARKET IN THE WORLD: BAGUIO NIGHT MARKET (ukay-ukay!, chicken skin, balut, isaw!!!! HAHAHA! Pakshet. Baguio days na supposedly eh.)

Ximending Night Market, Taipei, Taiwan

BIFF and Nampo Area Night Market, Busan, South Korea

Myeongdong Night Market, Seoul, South Korea

Chinatown Night Market, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

My favorite food to grab before going back to the hotel: Kanom Krok/Thai Coconut Pancakes

More kwento about my solo trip in Thailand: here.

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Madame Tussauds New York City, 43rd Street
Near Times Square

HAHAHAHA. Bakit ang saya?? I'm missing my girl friends every time I watch this video.

This is also filmed in NYC. <3
Movie Title: Someone Great

I saw familiar places because of the locations that were shown in this movie. Kakilig!!

This part is in Central Park West.

I know Central Park is huge - never imagined it will be that huge though that I think you'd need an entire day to explore the whole place. There is a part of Central Park where vehicles are allowed to pass so we were kinda able to see some part of it through the bus.

We went back here the next day and still weren't able to walk around the whole park. lol

This part is called Strawberry Fields.

A memorial of John Lennon of the Beatles.

St. Patrick's Cathedral

We weren't able to go inside the Cathedral the first time we went there so we made sure to go back to this part of Manhattan just so we can explore it longer. I've posted about it here.

Rockefeller Center and the Statue of Atlas

We were able to enter the building behind the statue and walk around the rest of the complex for quite a bit. The complex consists of 19 buildings, btw.

New York Public Library

Walking along Fifth Avenue while looking at the burgis shops. Walang afford, besh. Hahaha! This was also near the Consulate General of the Philippines.

Authentic NYC Pizza!!!!!!

I was so looking forward to eating this.

Empire State Building from afar.

"You make a million decisions that mean nothing, and then one day, you order take-out, and it changes your life."

Huhuhu! I didn't want to pay the entrance fee to access Empire State Building's Observation deck pero shetttttttt, Sleepless in Seattle <3

When I was living in Busan, I had a Dutch friend who was into architecture and she would sketch skylines and buildings whenever we went out. The reason why we got close was because when she found out that I like to walk around, she always asked me to accompany her. It was through walking with her that I got to see familiar places in a different light. I don't pay much attention to the details of buildings but she would always tell me to look longer and then explain something about the styles/designs of what we were seeing.

Busan's Flatiron - We were walking one morning in Haeundae and she pointed out that a building there reminds her of this Flat Iron Building. Never have thought that I'll be visiting the real building several months later.

After this tour, I messaged her on Instagram and told her how I wish to see and walk around New York with her 'cause I badly needed her commentaries so I can appreciate these buildings more. Also told her that even if I wanted to describe these buildings as specific as possible, the only descriptions that come out from my mind are: high-rise, beautiful, and lots of windows. HAHAHA! Galing. Grabe.

One World Trade Center

The tallest building in the United States and the Western Hemisphere. I saw this on a cloudy day but it looks a lot "grander" on a bright day because of the mirror reflection.

KEEP MOVING FORWARD

9/11 Memorial and Museum

The pits, 192 feet by 192 feet and 30 feet deep, are lined in black granite—black as death. Water cascades down the four walls and disappears into a square hole in the center of the pool.

The names here are names of the people who lost their lives during the 9/11 attack.

The Falling Man

This is one of the photos displayed in the memorial. I got heartbroken for the person in the photo when I saw it so had to search about it that night - disturbing at the same time, it looks like surrender and acceptance........... life is indeed a fragile treasure.

May we make the most out of this. For all our problems and anxieties, give them to God and let Him take over. *virtual hug*

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tungkol sa Philippines: Boracay Island, Aklan sana pero hindi

Take me back to that sun-drenched elsewhere....

I was out to watch the solar eclipse that occurred this afternoon. I forgot about it but a friend called to remind me so we ended up watching it together. Uhmm, parang mali. Di ko kasi alam kung tama bang watching the solar eclipse o mas bagay na we were outside and video calling while there was a solar eclipse. Wala lang. Dami problema? HAHAHAHA. Basta ayun, magkausap kami nung may eclipse.

Ako: Kaka-solar eclipse lang nung December ah.

Siya: Approaching seven months ago.

Awkward silence.

WHAT?!

Six months na lumipas - pa seven months na nga simula nung nag sabi kami na aayusin na namin buhay namin pero okay, aayusin pa rin naman. HAHAHA! Bakit kasi napakabilis... naman masira ng buhay? JOKE LANG. PAUSE LANG 'TO.

I like listening to stories other people share with me. I also like processing the new information I've learned through writing especially if it's something that I'd like to remember in the future. Anyway, this afternoon I learned about the significance of an eclipse in the Astrological point of view. What struck me the most out of all the things I was told is that solar eclipses tend to create new beginnings and that during this event, the universe is intent on moving us forward.

Very timely. To be honest, I've been feeling stuck the past few months (aside from being literally stuck at home) 'cause it feels like the life that I was building/creating was snatched away from me. The more annoying thing here is, I currently don't have a Plan C. It's not like I was 100% confident that things will happen the way I planned but it didn't occur to me that most of the things that I was holding onto for years can disappear just like that. I know that my situation is not the worst (one can experience during this pandemic) but this is definitely making me question what else do I want more from this life. By the way, there's a plan B which has always been a part of me and I've been focusing on that now but I don't know - may kulang kasi? Si Plan C talaga ang kulang. HAHAHAHA.

O baka naman gala lang talaga ang kulang? Malamang nga.

Bakit Boracay pictures ang napili ko para sa arte-arte na 'to? Kasi... wala sa listahan ko 'tong lugar na 'to. Wala sa Travel Plans A,B,C,D,E,F,G pero pumunta pa rin at nakakatuwa naman siya.

1. Isang araw naisip ko, "Paano kaya kung uuwi lang ako para mag palit ng backpack tapos aalis ako ulit?"

Nangyari nga 'yon. Galing akong Boracay, umuwi sa bahay, nag palit ng backpack, nag byaheng Norte. (sobrang babaw neto hahahahaha pero dito makikita kung gaano kalala ang malala)

2. Hindi ko ata naranasan makipagtakbuhan sa ulan nung bata ako pero naranasan ko makipag takbuhan sa ulan na sobrang lakas dito sa Boracay. Pabalik kami sa hotel dahil gabi na pero biglang umulan ng malakas. Kaya kami tumakbo para maghanap ng sisilungan pero 'yung kasama ko, biglang sinipa papunta sa'kin 'yung tubig-baha kaya nabasa na ko ng tuluyan. Alangan, diba? Edi sinipa ko rin papunta sa kanya. Hahaha. Hindi ko na naisip 'yung bag ko na hindi naman waterproof pati nga 'yung dumi ng tubig-baha makaganti lang ako. Dumiretso muna kami naligo sa dagat habang nagk-kwentuhan at tinitignan 'yung crescent na buwan at mga stars. Haaaaay. Good times.

Ayun na nga... paunti-unti, natatanggap ko na. If I'm holding onto nothing, I can do anything. Yan. Yan. Ganyan dapat, Tintin.

Kaya para sa mga bagong Plan C,D,E,F,G na kahit hindi ko alam kung paano ko ba bubuuin ng ganitong parang wala ng sigurado sa mundo ko e gagawin pa rin. Napag-isipan kong pwede pala akong mag simula sa "Paano kaya kung?" at mag-isip ng mga bagay na hindi ko pa nagagawa na pwede ko pang gawin sa hinaharap para meron naman akong bagong aabangan.

Be crazy enough to know that you can do anything you want in life.

I will emerge as a different person after all these upheavals.

I will accept change as a natural part of existence and gracefully roll with it.

This phase requires blind faith that the universe is on my side like it has always been.

Isingit ko lang 'yung henna tattoo kasi natutuwa rin ako rito. Hahaha! First time ko 'to mag palagay ng ganyan.

Feather morphing into flying birds henna tattoo (kasi may mawawalan ng bahay pag naging permanent tattoo). Di ko maalala pero something about courage, freedom at travel 'yung ibig sabihin niyan. Tinatamad na rin ako i-search.

Life is strange, isn’t it? You can be totally entranced by the glow of something one minute, be willing to sacrifice everything to make it yours, but then a little time passes, or your perspective changes a bit, and all of a sudden you’re shocked at how faded it appears.

It was bizarre so I was wondering what was I looking at. I even used to want it thinking that it was an answered prayer. Life can get pretty creative with regards to introducing stuff like this - hahaha - that almost got me. This is why being okay if something happens and okay if something doesn't happen is a very powerful place to be. For when it sinks in to you that what you're made to believe are all lies or are all something that are not going to come true, you are able to let go without bitterness and what ifs.

Letting go isn't giving up. It's understanding that the best is yet to come. Huyyy, huwag nga kasi sa taong naturuan ng Art of Detachment. Oh well papel. Hahahaha!

What we're feeling is okay.
Acknowledge it.

And pray.

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Probably my favorite part of this New York City tour is this Sightseeing Boat Cruise. I said probably because I don't want to single this out since I thoroughly enjoyed our whole trip. It's just that during this entire cruise, I was in a state of euphoria.

Cruise schedules are listed on their website.

This is at Pier 15 at South Street Seaport. There are also a lot of restaurants in the area for when you want to grab something afterwards while overlooking the East Hudson River. For another option, they have dining cruises as well.

This was our "cruiseship" that afternoon.

A lot of people stayed on the top deck but we stayed in the lower deck 'cause I wanted to go out at the front and at the back of the ship once it started sailing. Dami kasi tao sa taas.

We sat down at first 'cause we listened to the commentary while looking at the smoggy Manhattan Skyline. Hahaha! Gusto ko 'yung lagpas na nga ng isang taon 'tong trip na 'to pero parang hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala?

Manhattan is made up of grids.

Avenues run north-south and streets are east-west

This place is huge but it's impossible to lose your way especially when the streets and avenues are numbered... meet me at the highline near 10th avenue. Also, it was fun looking at the different styles of the buildings there.

I'm not into city travel as much as I am into hiking/nature travel but being able to walk around this concrete jungle made me appreciate this kind of travel more. There's something fascinating in observing the way life works in such a busy city. I don't even know how to explain this but it was enchanting - the Big Apple in its totality.

Ellis Island

I didn't know that this was a real place in NYC. Ellis Island is also a name of a restaurant I used to eat at in Las Vegas so it was nice to know about the history of this place. This place served as an immigration station for 60 years before it closed in 1954.

Some tourists are able to go up the crown of the statue but you would have to reserve slots months prior to your trip. Hindi ko naman na pinangarap 'yon. Okay na ko makatingin sa malayo saka mas mura rito. Hahaha!

One of the icons of NYC is the Statue of Liberty on Liberty Island.

This was a gift of friendship from France and is recognized as a universal symbol of freedom and democracy. Aba, may natutunan.

Definitely in awe of the skycrapers!

Not that I'm complaining that it was smoggy during the entire cruise but it was a bright clear day in NYC the day after this. Galing lang. Tinapatan lang kami para malabo tignan. Haha. Swerte namin dito. Kitang kita 'yung skyline... smog oh. 😂 Joke lang, New York. Baka di mo na ko pabalikin. 😂

Hello, Mamshieee! 💖💖💖

Travels are on pause and I don't even know when will it resume but we shall be travelling again.

Brooklyn Bridge

If this lifetime lets me set foot in New York City again, I'll make sure to walk across this bridge. Hanggang tingin lang niyan sa baba dahil malayo 'yung lalakarin at baka kasi mapagod 'yung travel buddy ko.

Nakakamiss din kahit papaano 'yung rebonded na buhok kasi mabilis ayusin. 'Yung buhok ko ngayon, paminsan kahit wala na ngang malakas na hangin e mukhang mahangin pa rin sa labas. Pero 'yun nga, hindi na ko babalik dyan sa ganyang buhok. Bakit? Kasi inayawan ko na nga, diba?? HAHA! Dami alam. Bahala na kami nitong puro frizz ball hair, magkasundo naman kami minsan. I'm still torn if I'm cutting my hair na shoulder length or pahabain ko na lang ulit though. Naisip ko kasi bago ECQ na pagupit ako ng May pero hindi ko naman nagawa obviously. Pag-isipan ko na lang pag feeling ko safe na mag pagupit sa salon. HAHAHA!

Hair Update Post.

Manhattan Bridge

I've seen this bridge in a lot of movies that were filmed in New York so I was so kilig. So kilig talaga, girl? HAHAHA!

Haaaaay. Sana clear skin pa rin. Well, hindi naman super clear skin ko dati pero I have a lot of blemishes these days. Mascne is a real thing. I've been having pimple breakouts in my chin since I started wearing facemask because of the pandemic. Pero duhhh kesa mas mataas risk na mahawa ako, diba. Tiis na lang muna. Gagaling at mawawala naman 'to. Arte ko lang talaga. Nyahaha!

The highlights of this sightseeing cruise are: Manhattan Bridge, Brooklyn Bridge, Manhattan Skyline, Ellis Island, and the Statue of Liberty.

Doing this cruise is a fun and fast way of sightseeing in NYC. The traffic congestion can be very bad on some hours so this is a great option especially if you're not into riding the subways.

Kk. Always grateful for the gift of adventure. Here's to more life surprises na hindi ulit ako makakapaniwala, universe. Alam mo na 'yan. ✨

Pero huyyyy, pangarap pala 'yang picture na 'yan ni Tintin 2014. Naisipan ko lang bigla i-search kung may nakasulat tungkol sa New York sa mga previous posts ko.

"I was ecstatic upon seeing this view from Liberty Loop. Huhu. Nasa katapat lang namin 'yung ulap eh. I took a picture with a replica of the statue of liberty again and as far as I know, whenever I take pictures with a replica, napupunta ko dun sa lugar na 'yun pagkatapos ng ilang taon. Yan, yan. I don't know how and I don't know when but I'm claiming it. Someday, New York!!"

Baguio 2014
Genting Highlands 2014

Lately I've been reading more about what they call TOXIC POSITIVITY 'cause I read about it once in a shared post in FB. Napapaisip tuloy ako kung naga-ganyan ko 'yung sarili ko o ibang tao ng hindi ko naman sinasadya pero 'yun nga, kung lumabas man na insensitive sa hardships ng iba hayaan na kasi nasabi ko na eh, I just want to learn more ngayon about sa HOPE AND VALIDATION. Okay lang (yakapin at ramdamin) 'tong negative experiences kasi this make us more human.

TP: It's not that serious.
HV: All feelings are valid.

Anyway... saka na 'yan.

Kinikilig lang ako na natutuwa na nagugulat din para sa mga bagay at experiences na sinabi ko lang naman (na gusto ko/ gusto sanang magawa) kahit hindi ko alam kung paano. Nakagawian ko na lang isulat ng isulat mga kung ano maisipan ko rito kaya paminsan sini-search ko rin mga past posts para malaman kung may nasulat na kabaliwan na naman.😅

Saka, hello. Sa eight years ko na 'tong safe space at sa sobrang random ko mag-isip, baka maalala ko pa lahat. HAHAHA! Basta nandun lang 'yung masabi ko at nasa intention ko na gusto ko pero di naman attached. Okay lang kung meron, okay lang din kung wala - ganyan. Wala lang. Ang bait ng pagkakataon kasi binibigay naman kahit mga ganitong bagay na hindi ko talaga alam kung pano mangyayari/nangyari. Lol. Ngayon ko lang din kasi naalala na, "Oo nga pala, dinasal/ni-wish/ni-claim ko 'to dati."

Life is not a bed of roses. I may have moments of bliss like this but I have a lot of bad days and sad experiences as well. Isipin na lang natin 'to especially sa sitwasyon natin ngayon. Makakabawi rin tayo. Hindi naman sa lahat ng oras malungkot. It may be difficult to see where should we be clinging for hope but there are reasons and learnings behind this.

Hindi ko rin alam kung paano pero someday braver, happier, more fulfilled, and more grateful self! Makikilala rin kita. Claim lang ng claim muna ulit. Dyan naman ata tayo magaling. 😂😅🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

"You can be drained, sad, angry, upset, overwhelmed, or unsure and still be positive."

God bless us. Fighting! 🙌

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